{"id":323,"date":"2003-08-07T07:43:01","date_gmt":"2003-08-07T11:43:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.sarahsthreads.com\/journal\/2003\/08\/destructo-boy-strikes-again\/"},"modified":"2003-08-07T07:43:01","modified_gmt":"2003-08-07T11:43:01","slug":"destructo-boy-strikes-again","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.sarahsthreads.com\/journal\/2003\/08\/destructo-boy-strikes-again\/","title":{"rendered":"Destructo-Boy Strikes Again!"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"In an attack that has had all remote controls looking for hiding spots under the couch, TiVo – a one-year-old remote – was found mauled on the kitchen floor. Investigators believe that the bite marks are consistent with the signature bite marks left by Murphy “Destructo-Boy” Reilly. The trial took only a few moments, with the unanimous decision of the jury arriving after only 30 seconds of deliberation.<\/p>\n

\"\"Destructo-Boy has been placed under house arrest, where he will remain until he repays his debt to society, or until his parole officer returns from work.<\/p>\n

The owners of TiVo could not be reached for comment; however, sources close to them have revealed that a replacement TiVo remote had been acquired through an eBay auction and is being shipped via two-day shipping.<\/p>\n

Destructo-Boy has told the media that it was simply his intention to ask TiVo to show him Good Dog U.<\/a>, which, tragically, was not even on TiVo at the time of the attack.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

In an attack that has had all remote controls looking for hiding spots under the couch, TiVo – a one-year-old remote – was found mauled on the kitchen floor. Investigators believe that the bite marks are consistent with the signature<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-323","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dogs"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sarahsthreads.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/323","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sarahsthreads.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sarahsthreads.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sarahsthreads.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sarahsthreads.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=323"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.sarahsthreads.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/323\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sarahsthreads.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=323"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sarahsthreads.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=323"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sarahsthreads.com\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=323"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}